cannot push today.

Ladies. Oh, Ladies. Don’t ever let a man let you think we’re the weaker gender.

We have it physically harder than guys if we have a seizure disorder.

Menstruation means guaranteed seizures. It also means, for me at least, guaranteed MS fatigue. Oh yeah, and you have your period.

If you ask me, this means I am freakin’ punk-rock tough if I’m still operating in any capacity whatsoever during my period.

Unfortunately, even with a 5 Hr Energy Shot, I can’t even stay alert for more than 5-10 minutes at a time today.

Adam woke me at 10:30 this morning with 2 Gabapentin and the 5 hr Energy Shot because it was about time that I get up, otherwise, I think I could have slept through the day.

I’ve only been able to eat an egg today, and like, a bite of the hash browns that Adam made for us. I feel awful for not eating more of what he made, but my stomach always feels so bad when I’m having seizures.

I keep trying to guilt myself into caring about studying for the bar exam today, but I just don’t. I’ll probably do some multiple choice questions later, but I honestly feel like crawling into bed. I’m only writing this so that when I look back and wonder what happened and why I wasn’t writing up essays and studying at the library with Rax, I know why.

There was a good 4-5 minute stretch earlier today where I had my hands on the keyboard and I couldn’t move them, and a few seizures earlier today where I couldn’t move for 8-10 minutes at a time. Today is just one of those “not in your control” days where you make the best of it.

I’m glad I recorded my outlines last year. I wish I had recordings for Professional Responsibility, Criminal Law, and Evidence… but making those will be studying too. I think I might just be listening to my own lectures today. Hey, something is better than nothing.

Edit: Apparently, the guilt worked. I do really care about studying. I just can’t make myself do it yet. MBEs make sense. At 2 minutes a question, I only need to be up for 5-10 minutes at a time.

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