Losing my sight, losing my mind, wish somebody would tell me I’m fine.

Ok, I hate that Papa Roach song. Seriously.
That was yesterday, though. Blurry vision, brain fog, memory problems… kind of hating the way I have been living my life.
Today, I feel so very much better, but it’s seriously bothering me that there is SUCH a dichotomy between my mind and my body. For lack of a better way to say it, I don’t look like me anymore.
Starting in May of 2007, just before diagnosis, I’ve had almost a year’s worth of bed/couch rest. Don’t believe me? Here’s how it’s shaken out.
Botched blood patch for the spinal tap = 3 weeks in bed
5 Solumedrol treatments in the last 2 years = 5 weeks in bed
Preparing for the bar exam (Studying 10-12 hrs a day, on my butt) = 2 months
Seizure Disorder discovery and coming up on meds = 6 months
Sedentary for a full year out of 1.5 years. Ok. I can understand how I gained 40 pounds… but I don’t have to like it, and I sure as hell don’t have to take it lying down, especially since it took me the better part of a year to lose that 40 pounds in the first place.
Today, I started diet and exercise in earnest. So far, I have exercised for 40 minutes and for my meals, I’ve kept them under 400 calories each with very low fat and high protein & fiber content. I am SO incredibly glad that the medicine is working to the point that I have mobility again. So what if I can only do 5 minutes at a clip on the elliptical trainer. At least I’m doing *something.*
My fitness goal for this week: 120 minutes of exercise
My food goal for this week: Remembering all the healthy meals I used to love to cook before the MS monster came after me and I wasn’t able to cook.
I’m always looking for new, yummy, low fat meals that take fewer than 45 minutes to make. If you have any that you particularly enjoy, please share! :)
In that “God-has-a-sick-sense-of-humor” sort of way, the best way to fight the degenerative effects of MS is to exercise, eat healthfully, and to continue to live your life as stress-free as possible…so I’m game to give it my best shot.
Some days, it seems to be just too much to ask my body to work out… but I’m going to be giving it the same attention that I used to give practicing music – and I suggest any of you having trouble with motivation do the same thing. Take 5.
Take 5 minutes to concentrate on nothing but the particular exercise you want to do, whether it’s music, exercise, or any other skill you’re trying to gain. If you want to knock out all 20-30 minutes of practice at once, then good on you – but at least do 5. If you do it twice a day, you’re already halfway there. It makes the whole task seem less daunting.
Take a cue from these musicians and remember – laugh, and the world laughs with you. Happiness is contagious.
(BTW, I do not endorse any of their viewpoints. I just think they’re hilarious performers. And here I was thinking my performance days were over. :) )

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